“The very word ‘secrecy’ is repugnant in a free and open society; and we are as a people inherently and historically opposed to secret societies, to secret oaths, and to secret proceedings.” – John F. Kennedy

I present to you ….

The Onion:Lapsed Cult Member Only Attends Sanctum On Major Bloodletting Holiday

Provided by another of the “disgruntled ex-students”, I know that this article is more of a spoof on Scientology than “school”; regardless, I hope it makes you laugh as hard as I did. Enjoy!