Before launching into this post, I want to say hi to Michael. How’s the cult? Are you “monitoring”? Just stopping by for some lite reading? Or … having doubts? Perhaps we “evil” bloggers, we band of “disgruntled ex students”, are on to something? Perhaps some aspect of this will ring true to you …
Now, about loaded language …
In the hallowed halls, the word overwhelmed was to be immediately dismissed. Bobert told us that there was no such thing — a false construction by lower beings–sleep walking, soul-less slobs, who didn’t have the privilege of being “schooled”. He scrutinized anyone who had the gall to say “I’m feeling overwhelmed“, especially if a cog’s overwhelm interfered with an enlightened “school” project — say, “making new friends”, and/or bringing “new friends” to “presentations”, or lying to local merchants to secure free Christmas trees for the “school” holiday party.
He also said, “confidence is a myth – it doesn’t exist.” We were not to use the word “just”. Essence Friends blared a shameful spotlight on “school” cogs who allowed the word “just” to slip in to a plebeian sentence. A more “awake” cog would interrupt the poor dear with a pointed “JUST???”
It was ridiculous, even funny, those linguistic infractions. But, trust me, when you are constantly monitoring your spoken language to screen out inferior words, you induce a special, cult-sponsored, type of enlightened naval-gazing — it’s an effective & insidious tool for inducing neurosis and self doubt.
Recently a fellow “disgruntled” and I were “breaking school rules” by talking on the phone without “school” monitoring (God forbid!!!). I admitted to feeling … no, don’t say it … OVERWHELMED. She called it “the O word.” We laughed, realizing that, even 5-years “school”-free, I still hesitate to utter the dreaded “O word”. I also still actively screen my vocabulary for the word “just” – filtering it out of conversation when I spot it.
These are examples of “school”-loaded language. I have spent five years, writing about, talking about, reading about my cult experience and digging into cultic studies. When I see those verbal viruses still worming around my psychology, I realize how impressionable & mold-able our psyches can be — we’re vulnerable by nature; the lower your esteem and confidence (oh, yea, confidence doesn’t exist … oops) the more vulnerable you are. Remnants o’ cult-hood within, like loaded vocabulary, prove tricky devils; they know how to hide in the shadows.
In his seminal book, Thought Reform and Psychology of Totalism, Robert J Lifton includes loaded 
language as integral to what he calls ideological totalism — “an extremist meeting ground between people and ideas.”
He wrote: ” The language of the totalist environment is characterized by the thought-terminating cliche. The most far-reaching, and complex of human problems are compressed into brief, highly reductive, definitive sounding phrases, easily memorized and easily expressed …”
Remember … “those are only life things“ “you are in internal considering” “what’s your aim?” “ask for help!” “are you remembering yourself?” “you are in self will” “breaking ‘school rules'” and my personal favorite, “the non-expression of negative emotions“ … etc.etc.etc.blah.blah.blah.
I’m sure you, dear reader, can contribute your own examples. “School” cogs don’t really know what these phrases mean, cuz the “teachers” can’t really explain them, but they are accepted as psyche-scrubbing and spirit-refining enlightened vocabulary.
Lifton wrote: ” … the effect of the language of ideological totalism can be summed up in one word: constriction. He is, so to speak, linguistically deprived; and since language is so central to all human experience, his capacities for thinking and feeling are immensely narrowed.”
Imagine those who’ve spent decades in “school” and worked their way into what is often called the inner circle — those who are “school” married and “school” employed; those for whom even the personal choice to have children, or not, or keep the child she had, was and continues to be dictated by the enlightened leadership (cough). This hijacking of person hood is a practice I call soul murder; even after one departs the ranks, it lurks insidiously, loaded language infecting thoughts, perceptions and impressions.
I believe the only way to purge and heal from this psychic virus, the way to reclaim and own your psyche, thus your life, is to share your story in some way, with other humans, if it’s only one other human, it will help. Problem is that, cults, like cancer, are not things we are inclined to discuss openly. Who among us would volunteer our cult days? Can you imagine saying to a friend, a cousin, a sibling, a parent, “Hey did I ever tell you about the cult that recruited me?” Most are too ashamed — how could I have been so naive? So trusting? So easily duped? With victim blame so prevalent and accepted in society, better to sweep it under the rug.
But not really; there’s nothing more empowering than reclaiming your own experience, by voicing your own thoughts, and generating an inner understanding of how your particular cult used, misused and twisted language, worming into and infecting your thought process, psychological makeup and inner emotional world. It is really key to recovery — because loaded language is at the heart of mind control. And secrecy only lodges it deeply into the darkest recesses, while protecting predatory groups like “school”.
Thus, I strongly encourage you to “break the rules” — take back your birthright and speak out!
Over late fall and early winter, my husband and I started binge-watching (horrors!) 
author, Maurice Sendek, told Terry Gross in his last Fresh Air interview, Live your life, live your life, live your life!